The Cabin in the Woods

The hardest people in the world to please are horror nerds. When a new horror film comes out, horror nerds will pounce and rip it apart. If it's a remake or a sequel, it is immediately tossed aside. If it's original, people will scrutinize every aspect of it. What does it rip off? Is it memorable or lame? Does it do something new, or just rehash? Does it do anything well? Is it scary? The list goes on. The Cabin in the Woods was clearly made from the perspective of a horror nerd, and it answers most questions positively. But is it the messiah horror nerds want? Not quite, but it's still fun. Our story starts as most horror ones do: with a group of stereotypes. We have the slut (Anna Hutchison), the jock (Chris Hemsworth), the nerd (Jesse Williams), the nice girl (Kristen Connolly), and the comic relief (Fran Kranz). These five are our students du jour being offered up to the titular cabin. Quite literally, because the situation is being manipulated with horror cliches and tropes by mysterious lab technicians. The equally mysterious lab that the technicians inhabit is full of buttons that do everything from raise zombies to unleashing masked killers. However, something more sinister is afoot, and our beleaguered teens are just getting started. The Cabin in the Woods is damn well made. The story is cool, the acting isn't half bad, the special effects are great, and it's kinda scary occasionally. Also, the way Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard's screenplay breaks down horror films and their fans is really insightful and smart. Never does the film take itself too seriously or preach down to its viewers. This is the horror nerd's horror film, and for most of it I really didn't have any problems. However, it was sadly not meant to be. I have decided that I just don't like twist endings. One hundred percent of them are trying to copy The Sixth Sense and almost one hundred percent of them don't work. Most of these twists and big reveals come completely out of left field and usually ruin the movie for me. This thankfully didn't happen to me in The Cabin in the Woods, but the ludicrous twist at the end was a big damper. The film tries to be something that has nothing to do with the tone of the rest of the story and makes the whole thing kinda silly. What I mean is it bites off a bit more than it can chew. For a while I was convinced I had to eviscerate this film. Luckily I gave myself the opportunity to think about it and now I've decided to cut it some slack. The Cabin in the Woods is like Insidious; a refreshing, well done, and modern take on American horror. It's a message to Hollywood that shows that new ideas are worthwhile and work. This is a really good movie that I enjoyed, and I think anybody can do the same. Trust me, you don't have to be a fanatic to get lost in the Woods.

Jeff, Who Lives at Home

My relationship with my younger brother is unlike any other. We two have a unique understanding of each other that I can't duplicate with any friend or family member. Do we love hanging out? Yes. Do we know each other's darkest secrets? Not really, but we can guess what's bugging the other one with amazing accuracy. We love each other, but do we drive each other crazy? Absolutely. I've never seen a movie like this one; one that capture "brotherdom" so accurately. Jeff (Jason Segel) is lost, plain and simple. He's unemployed, living in his mom's basement, and obsesses over the movie Signs. After getting a wrong number asking for "Kevin," the gullible and conflict-avoiding Jeff decides that's his sign, and journeys out to find it. Meanwhile, Jeff's lonely and bored mom (Susan Sarandon) asks his brother Pat (Ed Helms) to rescue his sibling from himself. Pat is hardly the right choice for this, as he is selfish, mean, and driving his wife (Judy Greer) away. Now they all have to find their path back. I really do love Jason Segel. He's a fantastic comedian, an extremely talented writer, and a really good actor overall. He also manages to be very comforting on screen. There's just something super charming and friendly about him that I really like. Especially in this film, where he isn't a sexual deviant or a puppeteer songwriter, it's amazing how he draws the audience's interest and sympathy. Jeff is a great character that anybody who has ever felt depressed can relate to. Of course, Ed Helms, Susan Sarandon, Judy Greer, and even Rae Dawn Chong are all great. The characters are really done well, which is important because they're the fabric of the film. But as I said earlier, the real uncanny for me was how realistic the interactions between Jeff and Pat are. Seriously, there were moments where the two argued and I gasped. The writing, direction, and the acting in these scenes reminded me of real life and made e rethink some stuff. And even though there were some moments where the pacing had some issues, I enjoyed myself throughout. Jay and Mark Duplass are very talented, but they must've had a weird childhood. Both Jeff Who lives at home and their previous film Cyrus deal with kidulthood, purpose, and single, overprotective mothers. While both films are quite different, the themes are there and very prominent. But the Duplasses always do it so well I shouldn't criticize. Jeff Who Lives at Home is a thoughtful, sad, funny, and moving film about stuck in a rut. It isn't so much a character piece as a family one, and anyone with siblings should definitely see it.

Wrath of the Titans

There's a limit to some things. For me, the limit on dumb action movies trying to be serious is very low. I absolutely cannot stand it when films like The Book of Eli or Daybreakers try to have an air of philosophy and depth amidst all the violence and nudity. This isn't Tarantino; movies like those should be nothing but an excuse to check your brain at the door. I don't walk into a movie called "Wrath of the Titans" expecting mediations on the role of organized religion in society. Whatever, let's just get this over with. A few years after the first movie, a curly-haired Perseus (Sam Worthington) is living happily as a fisherman with his son. That is until Zeus (Liam Neeson) comes to tell him that all the new atheism is diminishing the powers of the gods, including those trapping the titans in Mount Tartarus. Since that isn't enough, both Hades (Ralph Fiennes) and Ares (Edgar Ramirez) now serve Cronos. With the titans running amok, Perseus, Queen Andromeda (Rosamund Pike), and the son of Poseidon (Toby Kebbel) have to beat the baddies and save the day. Wrath of the Titans is a war, and not of what you might think. It's a war of European accents. This movie features Italians, Brits, Aussies, Spaniards, and a few I didn't recognize. And all of them try to talk over each other, creating a tornado of gibberish. Not that the story is clear or well told anyway, but you know what I mean. The film also has no rules; Perseus flies through walls and it has no effect, monsters materialize from midair, and wounds heal instantly. Finally, most of the action scenes are just Perseus getting his head kicked in by Ares. Honestly, Wrath of the Titans was a surprise.I did not think the series could go lower than the two minutes of Kraken and the ridiculous romance. This time the filmmakers somehow made it feel like they slapped two independently made bad movies together. It's like a cream-cheese bagel where the cream-cheese is all over the sides when you unwrap it. There's just too much and not much of it is worth trying to wipe up with your fingers. It's just a hot mess. I don't even know why I went to see this movie. I knew it was gonna be bad, so why did I even bother? Oh well, at least now I can gripe about it. Wrath of the Titans isn't fun, or clever, or smart, or anything; it's just kind of there. The movie thinks it's some sort of self-aware callback to Ray Harryhausen, but no, no it's not. Wrath of the Titans is just a particularly bad monster flick, nothing more. Hopefully, the next one won't be anything less.

The Hunger Games

Sometimes I see a trailer for a movie, and it doesn't do anything for me. It isn't that the film looks bad per se, just uninteresting. Like when I saw the trailer for The Hunger Games, it just did not stimulate any kind of response. Again, not because it looked back, it just passed over me. When I finally saw Hunger Games though, I was pleasantly surprised, and found that yet another movie had been shafted by marketing. I'm not sure this is the new Harry Potter, but it's pretty damn good. In the future, twelve districts rose up against the evil Capitol and were violently defeated. As punishment, each district much offer up a young boy and a young girl as tributes in The Hunger Games, a battle royale to the death. In order to save her sister from the Games, tough-girl Katniss (Jennifer Lawrence) volunteers herself. Katniss and her fellow tribute Peeta (Josh Hutcherson) are from the poorest district, and as a result are expected to die first. The two make friends in Haymitch (Woody Harrelson) and Cinna (Lenny Kravitz), but when the competition starts, everyone is on their own. Walking into The Hunger Games, I expected an anglicized version of Japan's Battle Royale. I expected the same plot only with a heightened romance, wacky sidekicks, and possibly Nazis. The good news is that I was wrong. The Hunger Games is its own thing for its own audience. Everything from the stark beauty of its sad world to the intricate mythos is very immersive and memorable. The Hunger Games is intense. The whole film is chock-full of tension that Martha Marcy May Marlene could only dream of. Each scene is directed as such; this is not an action movie, it isn't funny, and it is not Twilight. We feel the desperation of the contestants, unprepared teenagers forced to slaughter people they were allowed to befriend beforehand. Gary Ross does a great directing job, the script is really good, and the acting is damn fine. All the leads rock their roles, even Lenny Kravitz. Considering the record-breaking box office of this film and how long it has taken me to write the review, whoever's reading this has probably seen this film. If you haven't, do so. The Hunger Games deserves its popularity, and I can't wait for the sequels. I was really happy that I ended up seeing this film. This is mature very well done drama that should not be sold short because it's based on a teen book. Also, it actually finds a way to make its audience think without being preachy. Highly recommended.

The Raid: Redemption

I'm not going to waste time here: The Raid (I don't acknowledge the Sony-placed "redemption") is the best action film in at least twenty years. In terms of martial arts, it's on the level of Unleashed, Kung Fu Hustle, and Bruce Lee. Oh yeah, I went there. The Raid doesn't try to be serious or cerebral, it is just pure awesome for 90 minutes. It's cranked to eleven from the start and never looks back. Move over The Matrix, step down Jason Bourne; all hail The Raid. Rama (Iko Uwais) is an expectant father who is one of twenty elite Indonesian cops sent to take down a ruthless crime lord (Ray Sahetapy). Their target lives in a thirty-floor building full of wanted criminals who pay in exchange for protection. Early on, the team is caught on camera, and learnt that the mission was a way for a corrupt lieutenant (Pierre Gruno) to cover his tracks, and they're without backup. When the crime lord broadcasts a message promising permanent free stays to every person who brings him a dead cop, Rama and the others are caught in a storm of violence and survival. There's a moment in The Raid where you realize that it isn't going to develop characters well or have a deep story. It happens early on and the film is very clear that it doesn't care. The Raid knows what it wants to be: freaking awesome, and it it is all the way to the end. Director Gareth Evans shoots the fight scenes with the complexity of a Jet Li film and the brutality of a UFC match. Seriously, Silat is one of the most intense and bloody fighting styles I've ever seen, and the frenetic action sequences are so brutal you feel every pung. The fights are fantastically choreographed, and each one is unique; you never see the same kick kicked twice. Ok, I have to admit The Raid isn't perfect. I sometimes wanted more story, and the score by Mike Shinoda is appropriate rarely. Also, it is basically a live-action videogame. But so what? The Raid is an adrenaline shot straight to the heart of action cinema. There hasn't been an American action flick this nuts in ever, and I truly believe it will be remembered. Just...wow. You can probably tell by now that I'm running out of ways to describe how great The Raid is. I just had so much damn fun watching it, I don't know how else to talk about it. If this film is playing in your town, see it immediately. Even if you have to run across town to make it, even if it's playing in the worst theater in the area, just go.

21 Jump Street

This is my least kind of film to review. It's just hard to review a good comedy. I really don't want to give any of the jokes and gags away, and all I can do then is praise the stuff nobody cares about. Well, I will also mention that 21 Jump Street is the best 80s reboot ever made, and that it's the funniest movie since Hot Tub Time Machine. Actually, this is easier than I thought. Let's talk about a hilarious movie, shall we? In high school, the nerdy Morton Schmidt (Jonah Hill) was constantly tormented by popular jock Greg Jenko (Channing Tatum). By coincidence the two end up at police academy together, and bond over helping each other with their weaknesses. After failing to read the Miranda Rights to their first perp, Schmidt and Jenko are transferred to the 21 Jump Street program. Because of their youthful looks, the two are placed undercover at a local high school to take down the supplier of a dangerous new drug. When Schmidt becomes popular with the new Hipster ruling clique, the roles are reversed and hijinks ensue. As I have mentioned in the past, the best adaptations keep the spirit of the source material while doing their own thing. They tell their own stories in an established universe, if you will. Luckily for this film, the spirit of the original 21 Jump Street rests in the basic concept of the show. The writers of this movie know that, and they have turned that concept into a raunchy, violent, and profane comedy that is very, very funny. 21 Jump Street is very well made. The acting, writing, and direction all manage to keep the film fresh in each new scene. I was really surprised. When you consider the individual elements of 21 Jump Street, it really is a surprise that the movie is so funny. First, Channing Tatum is the star, and his track record isn't so great. But, he's hilarious here. Second, it's an 80s reboot/remake, and those suck. But as I said, this is the first really good one. Third, the trailers weren't great. But, it turns out it's way smarter than a dumb stoner comedy. There needs to be a serious improvement in marketing this year. First John Carter got totally shafted, then 21 Jump Street gives the wrong impression. Come on guys. My first R-rated movie was Caddyshack. Not only was it a classic, brilliant comedy, but it was a great childhood experience. I'm glad there are still movies like that. 21 Jump Street made me feel like a kid watching the funniest thing ever. Sure it has an R-rating, but anybody can enjoy it. That isn't often scene in our world of ultra political-correctness. Go see 21 Jump Street, it's a ton of fun.

John Carter

A studio's greatest double-edged sword is marketing. The right ad campaign can make a bad movie a hit and the wrong campaign can make a great movie a flop. For example, the ads and trailers for John Carter suddenly dropped the original "of Mars" from the title and gave little-to-no plot information. All I ever saw was a guy dressed up like Prince of Persia fighting aliens. Sure the movie looked cool, but I didn't know anything about it because of terrible marketing. When I finally saw the thing, I saw that it is in fact pretty good. Destitute Civil War veteran and general badass John Carter (Taylor Kitsch) is obsessed with finding a legendary "cave of gold." When he finally does, Carter also kills a mysterious robed attacker and takes his equally mysterious amulet. The amulet transports our hero to the surface of Mars, where he is taken in by Tarkas (Willem Dafoe) and his local green martians. As it turns out, the two main cities of human-like martians are in civil war, with the evil Sab Than (Dominic West) somehow possessing god-like luck. After saving a hot princess (Lynn Collins), Carter decides to face his destiny. John Carter's character is itself quite simple. The growly professional ass-kicker who doesn't want to get involved because of his dark past seen in everything. However the world of mars Carter fights in in the film is unique and fun. It's too bad the film doesn't explore it. After having a great time with the creative story, great action, and fun characters, I felt like I wanted more. John Carter is a classic space opera that's a bunch of fun for all ages, I just wish the universe had more detail In James Cameron's Avatar, you see every digital fold of the characters' skin as they move around and interact with Pandora. In John Carter, when the eight-foot-tall CGI Tarkas picks up Taylor Kitsch, the skin on Tarkas' thumb folds and the Kitsch's cheeks depress. When martian warriors slice each other apart and blast enemy ships to pieces, the effects and direction are incredibly exciting and beautiful to look at. Besides the princess, who is very wooden, the acting is pretty good, and the script, while silly, never gets Clash of the Titans level dumb. This review may seem a little tame compared to my other silly action movie reviews, but bear with me. John Carter is not a dumb movie. It isn't at all a great movie with it's random editing and pacing issues, but it's a great ride. There really isn't much else to say besides what I've already mentioned. The effects, story, acting, and action are all well done, exhilarating, and it never tries to be more than a blockbuster. Like Green Lantern last year, John Carter is only here to dazzle, and it succeeds.

Chronicle

Everyone wants superpowers. I'd bet that most people have at least thought about it. But what would the general population do with such power at their disposal? Unlimited, godlike power, what would you do? I believe it is naive to say that everyone has the personal fortitude to be Superman. What would that story look like? A person tries to be a hero, but can't take the pressure? Doesn't that sound like a cool movie? Too bad we got Chronicle? Social outcast/loner Andrew (Dane DeHaan) has decided to film his life, including his dying mother and his abusive father. One night, Andrew's cousin Matt (Alex Russell) drags him to a party. There, Andrew, Matt, and popular student Steve (Michael B. Jordan) go into a cave containing a mysterious glowing macguffin. As it turns out, the macguffin gives the three telekinetic powers. Their powers are constantly growing, but so are Andrew's problems, and things start to spiral out of control. Ok, first things first: to hell with "found footage" filmmaking. The Blair Witch Project is the only film to make use of the technique; the rest are just cash ins. Found footage is cheap, it's lazy, often nauseating, and an excuse not to try. It isn't edgy or stylish, it just creates a rift between the viewer and the movie and takes out out of the story. This is what happened to me with Chronicle. Because of the jerky camera and cheap production value, I just couldn't get into it. I'll give Chronicle one concession. It is well made. Besides the found-footage crap, Chronicle is well acted and directed, and has great special effects. However the film lacks coherence and any character development; most of the plot is very jumpy and silly. We aren't given a good transition from teens-with-powers to the eventual superhero chaos of the finale. The plot is very predictable and formulaic, a lot of plot points are abandoned halfway, and most of the story is filler between action scenes. About halfway through Chronicle I realized why it felt so familiar; it is the same story and basic plot progression as 1981's Akira. Only this time it's more angsty and in live action. I don't have time now, but given the proper forum I could draw parallels between at least five scenes and characters. So in the end, Chronicle isn't even original like the ads say it is. There are definitely interesting concepts in the film, but none are explored enough and I was left unsatisfied and annoyed. Maybe I'm too tough, but this is my opinion, take it or leave it.