Snow White and the Huntsman

Creativity is a good thing. As far as I'm concerned, turning old folklore into something new can be really cool as long you make it your own. The perfect examples are Guillermo Del Toro's Pan's Labyrinth and Neil Gaiman's Sandman graphic novels. For me, along with Fables by Bill Willingham and the Hellboy movies, those two are the ultimate examples of a great reinterpretation. And in the film world, we have rising stars like Tarsem Singh and Joe Cornish doing awesome stuff with traditional concepts. And from the interviews I've read with Snow White's director Rupert Sanders, I can tell he really tried to put a unique spin here. Too bad it all falls apart. Snow White (Kristen Stewart) is a girl with blood red lips and hair black as night who is being imprisoned by her evil sorceress stepmom Queen Ravenna (Charlize Theron). Obsessed with keeping her youth and (quite plentiful) beauty, Ravenna constantly consults her magic mirror, who tells the queen to eat Snow's heart for eternal life. When Snow White escapes into the Dark Forest, Ravenna sends a troubled Huntsman (Chris Hemsworth) after her. But fate has more in store for both the Huntsman and Snow White, and it mainly involves fighting Ravenna's empire in slow motion. Like I already said, I could tell that Rupert Sanders has a good head on his shoulders by watching this film. There's some really cool stuff here in terms of the film's universe and aesthetic design. The CGI is great and pretty to look at and the sets and action clearly had a lot of work put into them. But the writing, dear GOD the writing. And the acting, oy VEY the acting! Snow White had so much potential, but the film chooses to waste its assets and never ends up being any fun. More specifically, the problems with the script and acting are just too easy to pick at and should have been easy to fix. First of all, the script takes character and plot points from everything; nothing about this journey hasn't been done better elsewhere. Second, Charlize Theron really tries, but her performance is so overwrought and melodramatic it's comedic. Third, and here;s the root problem, to believe this film we must believe that Snow White is "fairer" than Ravenna. So when Snow White is Kristen Stewart, who has terrible posture and exactly one and a half facial expressions, I think saying she's fairer than Charlize is asking kind of a lot. I was pleasantly surprised by Snow White and the Huntsman, because when I entered the theater I was expecting another Battleship. If this had a better script and less K-Stew, it would be a totally solid summer fantasy-action flick. But the dialogue, and the Deus-Ex Machina, and the characterization is all ludicrous, and the acting is so dumb I can't compromise. Even though the dwarves' cast includes Nick Frost, Ray Winstone, and Ian McShane, my hands are tied to the faults. And remember, I write with my hands. Still, I do think it can go uphill from here, but as it stands, Snow White and the Huntsman hits the ground crawling.