Robin Hood Review

2/5

Robin Hood is one of those old legends that's basically impossible to do a movie of, because no one knows who he is and nobody really cares either. I know who Robin Hood is, and I know the gist of the mythos, but I also don't care about the idea of making a new Robin Hood movie.

I do care and like the idea of an alternate version of Robin Hood where Robby is the villain, and the sheriff of Nottingham is the hero. That's what this movie was supposed to be. Then, for whatever reason, they changed it to an origin story. A bad one.

Robin Hood is almost 3hrs long, and 95% of it could have been Gladiator with leather pants, if you had titled it differently. Then, just about when it's almost done, the movie remembers it's title and Robin is declared an outlaw.

Anyway, on to the technical stuff. Russel Crowe and Cate Blanchett are fine, but they are both MUCH too old to be playing the roles of Maids and Knights. The movie plods along, again, has nothing to do with Robin Hood, and is BORING AS HECK. Also, the script is just stupid. No character development except for Robin and Marion, the action is boring, the characters constantly spout terrible 1 liners, etc. Also, I guess this is a nitpick, but there's this subplot with these freakin' forest orphans that makes no sense at shouldn't exist.

Also, I know the Robin Hood backstory, and this movie ignores it. I'm all for reinterpretations, but just because people haven't heard of something doesn't mean you can just ignore it. All in all, only see Robin Hood if you're in need of a nap.