The A-Team Review

Rating: 3.5/5

I have never seen the A-Team show and I never plan to. However, I love action movies, especially big explosive ones that don't take themselves too seriously. This is one of those. The performances are good, especially Sharlto Copley and Rampage Jackson, and even though there are a few parts that stretch my disbelief a bit too far, I still say go see it, because it's better than most of the action movies these days.

Get Him to the Greek Review

Rating: 4.5/5

My favorite part of "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" was Jason Segel's character and his Dracula musical. However, it seems that everyone else loved Russell Brand's rebellious rockstar Aldous Snow. And so, we come to Get Him to the Greek, one of THE funniest movies I've seen since Pineapple Express.

Brand returns as the totally out of control Aldous Snow, who has to be herded to the Greek theatre by Jonah Hill in a last-ditch effort to make a ton of money for Snow's record label. What follows is a series of hysterical scenes, some of which are so funny that I can't choose a favorite.

My personal favorite element of the whole thing though, is P Diddy. He brings so much energy to the movie, and every joke he's involved in his totally hysterical. Anyway, DEFINITELY go see this movie, because it's just so funny.

Prince of Persia Review

Rating: 3/5

There are a lot of reasons not to see Prince of Persia. One, it's a video game movie, a genre that has a pretty bad track record. Two, you may be offended that Jake Gyllenhaal, a white man, is playing a Persian prince.

Let me put one of those fears to rest. Even though every video game movie imaginable is bad beyond belief, PoP is not. The main reason for this is that instead of trying to adapt the story of the game, it says "screw it" and comes up with an original story that keeps the spirit of the game.

Now, I've played my way through the entirety of the game this movie is based on, and it's just ok. The movie is also this. It doesn't take itself too seriously and has some cool effects and action sequences. But the acting is pretty hammy besides Ben Kingsley and Gyllenhaal. Back to the race issue, it's really hard to see why they didn't cast someone like Oded Fehr, even though Jake does a fine job. Overall, see this if you have nothing else to see.

Shrek 4ever After Review

Rating: 2.5/5

The original Shrek was great. The second one was ok. The third one sucked. This one doesn't need to exist. It's definitely bad, but not as eye-gougingly bad as the last one. I honestly will not miss the Shrek franchise. Besides an very funny Puss n Boots, the movie is just Shrek and Donkey making bad pop culture jokes that no one likes. The 3-D is also pointless. Just skip Shrek 4 I can't come up with anything to say about it.

Robin Hood Review

2/5

Robin Hood is one of those old legends that's basically impossible to do a movie of, because no one knows who he is and nobody really cares either. I know who Robin Hood is, and I know the gist of the mythos, but I also don't care about the idea of making a new Robin Hood movie.

I do care and like the idea of an alternate version of Robin Hood where Robby is the villain, and the sheriff of Nottingham is the hero. That's what this movie was supposed to be. Then, for whatever reason, they changed it to an origin story. A bad one.

Robin Hood is almost 3hrs long, and 95% of it could have been Gladiator with leather pants, if you had titled it differently. Then, just about when it's almost done, the movie remembers it's title and Robin is declared an outlaw.

Anyway, on to the technical stuff. Russel Crowe and Cate Blanchett are fine, but they are both MUCH too old to be playing the roles of Maids and Knights. The movie plods along, again, has nothing to do with Robin Hood, and is BORING AS HECK. Also, the script is just stupid. No character development except for Robin and Marion, the action is boring, the characters constantly spout terrible 1 liners, etc. Also, I guess this is a nitpick, but there's this subplot with these freakin' forest orphans that makes no sense at shouldn't exist.

Also, I know the Robin Hood backstory, and this movie ignores it. I'm all for reinterpretations, but just because people haven't heard of something doesn't mean you can just ignore it. All in all, only see Robin Hood if you're in need of a nap.

Iron Man 2 Review

Rating: 4.5/5

The second installment of the best film franchise in the history of Marvel Comics is finally here! Man am I excited. The first one was great! Is the second? Let's take a look.

Tony Stark is back, and he's not happy. Turns out the very thing keeping his heart going his slowly giving him blood poisoning. As a result, Tony sets up a series of clever turnouts that give Pepper Potts the CEO position, and a certain friend something else.

Ok, I'm going to stop being coy, Don Cheadle (who is much better than Terrence Howard) gets a suit and becomes War Machine!! Nick Fury returns!! Scarlett Johansson is Black Widow, and spends most of the time in a tight leather bodysuit!!! All the components are great!! The movie is fun!! My only complaint is, Mickey Rourke doesn't get enough to work with, but Sam Rockwell is great!!!

Ok, nerdsplosion over. In all seriousness, the whole movie is just on a higher level than the first one. The characters are deeper, the writing is smarter, and the plot is going more to the AVENGERS!!!!! Anyway, Iron Man 2 is a lot of fun, so go see it. Now.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010) Review

Rating: 1.5/5

Freddy Krueger, along with Michael Myers, Leatherface, and Jason Voorhees, is one of the four staples of 80's horror. And, like Myers, Leatherface, and Voorhees, Freddy has now been remade by the man himself: Michael Bay. Let's dive in shall we?

Just like in the original, the new "Nightmare on Elm Street" centers around a group of teens who are haunted in their dreams by a burned man in a sweater with knives on his fingers. This man is of course, Freddy Krueger. Exactly! Everybody knows who Freddy is, and it's not like Friday the 13th where it's just Jason lumbering around slashing people.

Freddy has a personality, he's funny, he's memorable! But not this Freddy. This Freddy, played by the massively talented Jackie Earl Haley, barely has much dialogue, and you almost never see his face. Like I said, we know who Freddy is!! Stop hiding him, even if the makeup is stupid looking!!

Also, why is Freddy a child molester now? That fact just makes the whole experience just creepy and uncomfortable to watch. Anyway, there's too much focus on the unmemorable teenagers, the writing sucks and it's BORING. I don't wanna talk about this movie anymore, so just skip it.